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Call center eavesdropping, anyone?!?
Monday, July 02, 2007

Ah huh... You must probably know that I am part of a call center quality assurance department as stated in my profile. I’ve been listening to calls for more than two years now (with 1 year handling a crew of 27 people). The accounts that I am handling (unfortunately) are all North American accounts. For the other teams, they get the chance to audit local call center professionals (we are an outsourced-third party auditor). They get to listen to agents not only from Manila but to call center agents across the Philippines (even as far as Bacolod). People from the operations department would call us "God", or the "Police", the "fault finder." Sorry naman, wala naman kaming magagawa. Trabaho lang, walang personalan. hehehehe. I have heard almost all types of calls- from prank calls to demanding (but stupid) callers to hilarious CRS (whoI think, sometimes suffers from “nose-bleeding” miski naman ako eh..sorry..tao lang. LOL). For a while, I’ve been trying to collect some funny recordings that I got not just from my crew but also from the other teams. I didn’t realize that I have collated a lot already. I have first thought of sending this to my crew and other friends but I think I might just go ahead and post it in my blog (para naman lahat makabasa just in case mapunta sa Spam folder ang email ko.) While some people think that call center people are just a bunch of bourgeois stupid people who knows nothing but good (but sometimes trying hard accent) English, I feel sorry for them coz na-ahh--being a call center agent takes a lot. Bawal dito ang slow at engot. Otherwise, you’ll be the center of destruction (READ: KATATAWANAN) Hehehehe! So here it goes (eto ung mga favorite ko)…



agent: thank you for calling (company) can i have your order or customer number please?

customer (irate): i am going to smash this computer into your face!

agent: is that a desktop or laptop?

***


customer: my address is 459 quintin drive...
agent: sir, is that Q for cucumber?


***

technical support: ok sir, can u pls type cmd on the run field
customer: what?!!!
technical support: cmd sir
customer: (beginning to be irate!) WHAT IS THAT?!!!
technical support: ok!!! c as in CLIENT, m as in MUST and d as in DIE

***

agent: (gave an assumptive question to get the billing add) so ma'am, youre still living at P.O. Box...
customer: honey, i dont live in a box. i have a house.

***

agent: Thank you for calling... this is Candy how may I help you?

customer: What did you say your name was... Mandy?

agent: No sir it's candy...

customer: Sorry can't hear did u say Mandy?

agent: No sir.. candy sir ...candy as in Storck!

customer: What? You’re a strange girl Mandy!

***

agent: So, you want to reset your password? Is that correct? (super paraphrase talaga si agent...LOL)

customer: Yes.

agent: Would you like to set your own password or would you like me to give you a generic password.

customer: Uhmm.. just give me a generic one.

agent: Alright. I have reset your password. Your new password will be... let me spell it out for you. That’s K as in Kilo ... A as in apple....M as in mama.... O as in October..... T as in tango.... and E as in Echo

customer: “Kamowt?” (kamowt in American accent—kamote in Pinoy). That’s a cool password. I’ll never forget this. All right. Everything is working.

***

agent: i was hoping you can take this survey with me. would you have the time to do that sir?

customer: how long is this going to take?

agent: mga three minutes.

***

And my very own blooper when I was working as a Tech Support Rep for Dell. After resolving the issue of a very irate customer, I had the chance to get myself a “payback” time. Darn it! I spent almost 2 hours resolving his old pc (model 96) issue---add the fact that this customer has a hearing problem. Para kong nakikipag usap kay Mang Inggo..Lintek!

customer: I no longer remember my service tag number and losing that is a real pain in the ass. Can you give me my service tag please?

thet: Sure. Do you have a pen and paper handy? (in a dead tone voice)

customer: Yes I have.

Thet: Ok. (imbento na lang service tag, can no longer remember it eh). That is 2g49rsd.

Customer: What is the last letter again?

(Seeing this opportunity to get back at thhis customer)
Thet: That’s D as in Divisoria. (wahHhHHHhHhH!!!!)


Sometimes, I miss handling customer calls. It makes me feel like I am a human again --- unknowingly,unintentionally but hilariously make mistakes.


Labels: ,

posted by ruther @ 5:13 AM  
16 Comments:
  • At 7/02/2007 4:04 PM, Anonymous cheche said…

    you really listen to them for QA? literal ba when they say your call may be monitored ekek? kala ko joke lang! =D sorry ha, im just really interested. napapaisip tuloy ako ng sarili kong bloopers pag tumatawag ako sa cs hehe

     
  • At 7/03/2007 1:46 AM, Anonymous `ch13f said…

    hahaha.. kaloka yun miss thet ..hehe
    call center bloopers! haha..

    speaking of call center,

    i remember what the IT student said ..

    "When I grow up, I want to be a Call Center"

    LOL!!

     
  • At 7/03/2007 4:55 AM, Blogger ninjathet_0312 said…

    cheche: yep...talagang mino-monitor namin yon.. ngaun nga may kasama pang screenshot ng PC ng CS. kaya ung ibang nagpre-friendster o nagcha-chat habang take ng calls..huli din...LOL

     
  • At 7/03/2007 4:56 AM, Blogger ninjathet_0312 said…

    ch13f: ahahahahaha!!!! talagang ganun...minsan, nakaka nose bleed din ang mag monglish miski everyday ka ng sumasagot ng calls... hihihihi.

     
  • At 7/03/2007 7:41 AM, Blogger MundRay said…

    heheh. kakatawa naman. Pano kung may customers na makulit as in sobrang kulit yung nanluluko?
    how can you handle that situation?

     
  • At 7/03/2007 8:21 AM, Blogger ninjathet_0312 said…

    to mundray: lol. alang magagawa. kelangan pa rin professional. pero pag tinawag na kong "one of the monkeys in the philippines" or "asian biatch", ayYy warla na ito..babagsakan ko sya ng phone..kebs kung ma-QA atashi..LOL

     
  • At 7/03/2007 12:10 PM, Blogger chepot said…

    hahaha... pede pala magimbento ng service tag huh.

    narinig mo ba yung me bastos na customer tapos napuno yun agent at minura nya rin yun customer pero syempre natakot din in the end nung tinatanong sino manager nya. pano pag ganun? tanggal ba yung agent nun?

     
  • At 7/03/2007 2:23 PM, Blogger ninjathet_0312 said…

    yep..ung taga PLDT? Meron akong entry nun...


    http://ninjathet031207.blogspot.com/2007/06/ive-been-thinking-about-posting-this.html

     
  • At 7/03/2007 2:24 PM, Blogger ninjathet_0312 said…

    at chepot: yup..natanggal ung agent na yun...malas nya..na QA sya.lol

     
  • At 7/03/2007 11:18 PM, Anonymous Nastasshea@Nesh said…

    Hahaha I like the comic part! Guide book to read b4 calling the cal centre!

     
  • At 7/03/2007 11:33 PM, Blogger KaThYcOt ;p said…

    nyahhahaa! gusto ko ung kamote password! wuhuuuu! panalo un thet! :)
    jusme mukang di ako uubra talagang call center, bukod sa nose bleed mode na diko kakayanin eh mahina pasencia ko! malamang wala akong trabaho agad.. ehehhehe...
    happy day thet!

     
  • At 7/04/2007 7:30 AM, Blogger Surfergirl said…

    haha this is funny! where i work, we have so much indian call agents ringing our work line. nakakairita! sorry pero minsan di ko alam pano sila natanggap maging agents kasi sobrang hirap intindihin!! tapos may lag pa (i assume they use skype!) kaya wala. labo labo na. i just hang up on them.

     
  • At 7/05/2007 12:30 AM, Anonymous Syafrizal said…

    Here in Malaysia, people always call our monopoly broadband company's call center and even scold that call center person. The service is sucks and a lot of time people will say with vulgar words. ;)

     
  • At 7/05/2007 4:42 AM, Anonymous Reyville said…

    Now that's entertainment...

     
  • At 7/07/2007 5:29 PM, Anonymous Jaywalker said…

    Funny but...... I don't think this should be aired, the people who were recorded was advised that this was for quality control purposes. This may pose a problem on violation of privacy and depending on the state where the other party who was recorded can prove that he was the one alluded to he/she can seek redress for violation of privacy. The company or the call center can also be held liable in this event.

     
  • At 7/07/2007 8:55 PM, Blogger ninjathet_0312 said…

    hi Jaywalker... first of all, id like to thank you for your advocacy for the right to privacy. BUT to answer your POV.

    1. There wasn't any violation of privacy in this post. Names of the customers were not disclosed, not even the address (see the P.O Box sample) and not even the name of the company. ("The accounts that I am handling (unfortunately) are all North American accounts. For the other teams, they get the chance to audit local call center professionals (we are an outsourced-third party auditor). They get to listen to agents not only from Manila but to call center agents across the Philippines (even as far as Bacolod).")---

    as for my last statement that I made "And my very own blooper when I was working as a Tech Support Rep for Dell." ---We were allowed by Dell to disclose to the customer the location where they are calling to. I did not disclose the name of the customer. Rather, I shared my own experience.

    If we are talking about violation of privacy or the call center being held liable for alluding the customer, I firmly believe that I should be the PLDT call center and ABS-CBN who first aired a conversation (via primetime new program) between a CSR and an irate customer.

    I hope I made sense to you. I've been in the call center industry for quite a while and I know the tricks of the trade. Before blogging something about work, I consult our company policies and procedures to ensure that I am adhering to the company's rules and regulation.

    Thank you. :)

     
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About Me
Name: ruther
Home: Ontario, Canada
About Me: *25-something faggot *proud pinay *business degree imbecile *iskolar ng bayan *former student activist *call center quality assurance supervisor* former DELL computer technician* *prefers grave yard shift rather than day shift job *doesn't drink nor smoke *koreanovela sucker *lead guitarist *internet-holic *bossa nova aficionado *KFC extreme hot shots lover *imago's fan *sydney bristow apprentice(wish!) *gil grissom struggling student(talk about being geek!) *jack bauer's love interest(another wish!) *michael scofield's savior(get real!)* avid follower of jerry bruckheimer *soon-to-be-bride of a very wonderful groom.
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